Friday, March 23, 2012

I and My House are a Mess!

Psalm 23, with an honest evaluation of how I have been applying (or not applying) these awesome Words to my life.

The Lord is my shepherd (when I allow Him to be)
I shall not want. (Even though I do want - lots of things - I will try not to want unreasonably)
He makes me lie down in green pastures; (even though I don't see them)
He leads me beside quiet waters. (Even though I tend to stir them up)
He restores my soul; (time after time, after time)
He guides me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake. (This means He guides me when I seek Him. When I forget to seek Him, or ask for His help, more often than not, I end up on the wrong track!)
Even though I walk through the
valley of the shadow of death, (Sorry God, I know that not having enough money for the things I think I need, is not actually the valley of the shadow of death, nor is having shoe envy! - but I get what you mean here)
I fear no evil, for You are with me; (I know You are with me, God, but sometimes it's so hard not to worry or be afraid. Bad things have happened in my life in the past, and I keep being afraid they will happen again.)
Your rod and your staff, they
comfort me. (Yes, God, I have to admit that in probably every tough lessen I had to learn, I came out better for it. I don't like tough lessens at all - as a matter of fact, I dread them, but there is comfort in knowing that once through the lessen I will be stronger and a better person for it. And when I let You lead me, my reward is always greater on Your path than my own.
You prepare a table before me in the
presence of my enemies; (sometimes I don't get this one - but I know that when I'm around people I don't know, or those I feel uncomfortable around, or a little scared of - if I just say a quick prayer to You to help me or keep me safe, I always feel reassured. I know from Your Word that You will bless me for my faithfulness and carry me through any danger.
You have anointed my head
with oil; (and my feet with beautiful shoes)
My cup overflows. (Yes, Lord, even though I like to "want," I do realize that I have much more than many, many others. I have a non-leaking, heated and cooled roof over my head; I have a dependable car to get me where I need to go; I have ample and nutritious food in my tummy every day; and I have so much love and support in my life from family and friends - My cup does overflow! I will be grateful!! And during those times when the level in my cup begins to lower, yes even when it seems it will dry up - well, somehow just in the nick of time You fill it back up and then even overflow it again! I will remember this! I will!
Surely goodness and lovingkindness (and mercy)
will follow me all the days of my
life. (This means God will take care of me, providing for my basic needs and love me forever. This does NOT mean I will always be trouble-free, carefree, or rich! But I promise I will try to remember this and be grateful, even in the tough times.
And I will dwell in the house of the
Lord forever. (Thank You, God, that I have Your house and Your presence to dwell in. I, and my house are a mess! )

Thank You God for the Words You give me - that You give to everyone, to help me - us- make it through each and every day. God, please help me remember to start each day saying "hi" to You, and asking You to walk with me that day, and to be with me, no matter what. Show me who You are in my life, God. Give me faith to believe completely in You, and that You have a pre-made plan for me, because You loved me and formed me, and consecrated me even before I was born. Please help me be faithful. I love you God.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Today we find a car

Okay, back to the "just moved to Boston, gotta get settled" story. Yesterday we found and settled on a place to live. Today we find a car.

In typical fashion for our personalities, Bill and I weren't even close to agreeing on what kind, color, type of vehicle we wanted to buy. For right now we are just going to buy one car for the two of us to share, so we need something that fits both of us. Bill, being the wonderfully frugal and financially savvy guy that he is, would rather have a smaller, economical, gas efficient car that will get him from point A to point B in the most cost efficient manner. No fuss, no frills, just be dependable and economical. I, of course, wish for something a little more stylish, a good color, a few creature comforts, and NOT a smallish car! My heart and brain are set on a small SUV so I feel more safe and have more power for my little 5'3" stature. I don't like having to look up to people all the time in conversation, so I wear heels. So, it is only natural that I would like a little larger vehicle so I don't feel so intimidated by the big SUV's on the road. BUT...they are gas guzzlers - oh no! And they cost more - oh yes!

So, same as yesterday in the house search, today we are in a stalemate - again! At this point Bill and I are so stressed out from moving half way around the world, 2 weeks of no sleep, junk food, worrying about our kitty, and too many crazy decisions, that we can't think straight. We each are on our last nerve. We're thinking God must have some crazy sense of humor to put us two together, as different from each other as we are. (we have been married for over 18 years though, so something must be right!) But right now we can't agree on anything. And today we have to find and purchase a vehicle. And find a Massachusetts insurance agent to insure it.

We decided last night to look online and explore websites, cars, and options. At this point, Bill has succumbed to my need for a small suv, as long as I can find one with good gas mileage. Let me tell you, this is a hard task!! So, today I am looking at several websites and loosing hope. All the suv's I like only get 20-22 mpg hwy, even though I have lowered my wish list - no Lexus, no Acura, no Volvo, no, not even a Nissan or Toyota. The whole morning is wasted and I have found nothing. Bill is frustrated with me and the whole situation. I get overwhelmed and frustrated and retreat to the bedroom in tears again.

And again, through my exhausted tears, I send up another plea to my Lord, asking Him to please help me again. I even asked if He would just make the right car appear before our eyes somewhere. I was a hopeless mess, incapable of making any decisions, and my poor husband wasn't much better. (I told you in the last post that I have a hard time keeping things simple; I sure wasn't making things easy for my poor Bill, who was already nervous and anxious about starting a brand new job in 2 days. Not very nice on my part, I have to admit.)

So there I was, crying and asking God to pull me out of the fire - again! And here's the amazing part...

I dried my eyes, went back to the computer to look some more. I pulled up the last website I had been on. Only this time, there is a picture of a pretty Ford Escape LTD. It's black and shiny. Oh, and it has tan leather interior - not black! Pretty!! And it's 4wd, which everyone tells us we need up here. And guess what - it's in my price range! And oh my Lord - it says it gets 26mpg!!!!!!! I yell out for Bill - come look! He comes over and looks...and he wants to know more about it. Well, we pull up the details; moon roof, heated electric seats, ipod/phone hook up, sm satellite - and much more - all the little creature comforts I secretly wished for, but just knew I couldn't have. And the best part was, it was at a dealership only 5 miles from our hotel. No way!! Yes way!!!

We called, we went to look at it, we drove it, got $500 more off the price - we bought it!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!

OML - He really did just make it magically appear before our eyes! The exact right compromise for both of us, in a vehicle we are both ok with! Wow - and it was the only car we actually had to go look at. The first car was the right car. God - you really rock! You provided for us - yet again, in a big way! I am humbled and amazed. I just can't believe He really just made that car appear out of nowhere, for us. Thank you, God.

Yeah - it was God who made things happen for us this weekend - I know it was. Because I asked Him to. He loves me so much, go figure. I must remember to ask for His help BEFORE I get so stressed out. Things sure would be a lot easier sometimes. And I wouldn't make things so hard on my poor husband, who I guess puts up with a lot from me!

How about you?

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Wow, I can't believe I'm in Boston (Lexington) Massachusetts to actually live! What a dream life it was on the tropical and beautiful Island of Kwajalein for 5 1/2 years. Warm weather and sunshine year round was amazing. Riding bikes for transportation and having no cell phones was fun and relaxing. I already miss all our great friends, and I especially miss everyone from the Chapel. Pastor Jon - I could use one of your little mini-sermonettes right now!

But that life is done, new adventures await here in Boston - I can't wait to get started!

And get started we did - with lots of decisions, which of course caused tons of stress!!

And do you think I relaxed and took one thing at a time, relying on God's strength and wisdom to accomplish each decision and task??? Of course not...

But the thing is...God takes such good care of me anyway - He is so awesome and faithful - even when I don't deserve it! You know, I don't know why I work myself up into WORRY and anxiety all the time, over just plain STUFF. And then it's not until I'm in a desperate migraine mode before I remember to talk to God and ask for His help. Why in the world do I wait sometimes until I am a total nervous wreck, being mean to my husband, before I remember to look up for help? Well, here's the scoop:

We arrived in Boston on Thursday evening. Bill was set to begin his new job on Monday. So, we basically had 2 days to (1) find a place to live- one that would allow our cat, (2) find/buy a car - we're in a rental, (3)find an insurance agent and insure house and new car (4) find a sleep store and buy a new bed and set up for delivery once we find house (5) shop for a week's worth of business casual WARM clothing for Bill, (6) get utilities set up and paid for new place to live. I know I have forgotten many other little things that seemed to take forever to work out, but those were the biggest items on the immediate agenda.

Now mind you, Bill is an electrical engineer; engineers are famous for being extremely frugal and technically and logically minded. In other words, don't think with your emotions and don't spend one penny more than the bare minimum on anything!! Okay...well, I am a very emotional and frou-frou person. Not really high maintenance, but definitely particular, and I have a hard time keeping things simple. Needless to say, my husband and I didn't agree on anything in our house and car hunting. So we didn't accomplish very much, very quickly. Uggghhh!

We met with our relocation Realtor on Friday morning. Narrowed house choices down to 3, but of course Bill's favorite was my least favorite, and my favorite was his least favorite. Uuuugggghhhh again!!! We discussed and retreated, and discussed and retreated and discussed some more. We had to make a decision that day, and after more than a week of travel and very little sleep we were at a stalemate. I finally retreated to the bedroom (in our hotel) with a headache and in desperation, and a few tears, cried out to God to please help us, to please show me what to do. I wanted to do the right thing, and I wanted my husband to be comfortable wherever he lived, but I hated the place he wanted. But I didn't want to just be stubborn, and I wanted the decision over with. But I didn't want to live somewhere I didn't like.

So, I sent my plea up to God, shed a few final tears and then suggested we go look at my favorite place again and see if Bill liked it any better. Well, remember I said God is so faithful and takes such good care of me? Okay, here's the good part:

We are driving by my favorite place when our realtor calls on my cell. She says she just spoke to the owner and they just rented the house to someone else. It's now off the market. And not only that, the third place we were interested in would not except our offer. So, that just left 1 place. The decision was taken out of our hands. God intervened and worked fast!! Yes, the only place left was the town home Bill wanted, that I strongly disliked. But being a woman after God's (and my husband's) own heart, I bucked up, swallowed hard and said ok. Then I thanked God for making the decision for us and asked Him to give me grace to see it through. We went back to the town home, toured again, this time I imagined our personal stuff in there, and guess what - I actually started liking it. And the best thing is that it is right across the street from Bill's work so he won't have to struggle in commuter nightmare traffic!! And it allows my cat!! Yay!!

God is Good! And He answered my call!!

Next blog I will tell you about God's next decision for us, the very next day. It was even more awesome.